danipower0204

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Thanks for the reviews! Could you please give an example of what you mean with "the flow is off" or "It tends to get off the flow at many places"? ...

When life shits on you with bricks by danipower0204 Let me tell you a small fact, About this little thing called life. It can be a railroad track, Every station ...

I also think this has great potential. By that i mean if you stick some metaphors in there and some similes inam sure it will he a lot more powerful. ...

So, I liked this. Rhythm-spot on. Big fan of rhythm. You did. Great job keeping the rhythm constant and tight. Rhyme was also good. Didn't sound forced. I didn't really ...

Well done. Enjoyed this a lot. You're 13 and writing poems like this? Crazy. Just imagine what you will be writing in the next few years. As to the poem, ...

Ingenious. Really. Made me laugh out loud sometimes. This was truly awesome. I could do some spell check/grammar check, but I can't be bothered right now, sorry. I'd much rather ...

I cannot tell you what it is, But inside me there whirls this storm, Which I cannot control as it Propels my thoughts away from norm. This thing, it fires ...

Thanks for your comment, Lavender! Glad the feeling of it all came across.

The diamond girl was flawless, her form and gait pristine. God made her eyes from stars and seas, and stroked his jealousy. Like this a lot. "My dear," Hell said, ...

Thanks for your comments and reviews! Really really appreciate them.

Hey there. So, if I'm quite honest, it did not read much like a poem. It is very prose-like, if not, just prose. Also, no idea what this was really ...

Fore the Angels' fall, In the midst of tranquil winds, Nymph embodied all. All the brown and blue, Waters, lands and manly thirsts, Nymph, the men, did woo. From the ...

Life is full of heart ache with a severed chest , a blood trail leading down the hall , a closed door hiding a loved one with barred teeth , ...

Thanks! Glad you liked it.