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Deception, broken heart, or a whim? Why? Never mind.

Was it written on a whim? Or for a purpose? Say, broken heart? Or back stabbing friends? Or is it open for interpretation? Sorry if its personal. You are in ...

Yeah, spaces after all of your commas (, ) and periods (. ). Was it betrayed trust? Or a broken heart? Or was it open for interpretation? Or was it ...

Yeah, some typos, and unfinished thoughts. the idea is fine, but work on the details.

I liked it, but, yeah, everyone else has already covered it.

There's a bunch of misspelled words, Careful! Commas and description are needed. I like the idea, but you need to make it more interesting, or the reader, well, won't be ...

Even as you kiss her cheek, I hold out a foolish hope. For every tick of the clock, You crush another dream. For every dream that lie in shards beside ...

Is there supposed to be a solid deeper meaning? Because I can see a few ways someone would take it. I like it, but I think you could continue that ...

Is it like a cold, uncaring persom, who would do anything to anyone? Interesting...

Does it symbolize war? Like, the soldiers always watching over and making fun of the people? I like it.

Mist- Is this supposed to mean a hope is also a fear at the same time? Like, you want it to happen, but, at the same time, you don't want ...

I really like it. It is an awesome way to explain how you feel about life. Or just a good poem, if that's all it is. Well, I think it's ...

Interesting. I would like more detail, though. Very, very non-descriptive.

I think its very well written, I prefer free verse, though.