blackstorm

I thought it was extremely good. It could maybe use some more emotion though. I mean, it only mentioned the boy being sad at the beginning. If my dad where ...

As the raven flew through the dark, stormy night its attention was drawn to a solitary shadow of a figure on top of a building. It was crouched down and ...

I actually liked it. And it's college not collage. Also, don't put your work down before anyone even reads your material. Be proud of it. (Obi-wan has spoken!)

I liked it. However, the "That monstrous of a pit." part doesn't make any sense. Are you trying to say "monstrosity" or "monstrous beast" or maybe just plain "monster"? Anyway, ...

As I stand, rooted to the floor I feel great oceans of water begin to rise up in me. It rushes forth as I see your form slowly drifting away ...

Here's a rewrite. See if this is any better. :) What a wonder this is that you, my angel, would come down to me with your flaming snakes of tempered ...

Good poem, but I have a question. When you say "Oh my heart. Im so sorry I make you ache this way. My heart loves the way you smile, sing, ...

I LUV IT! ...Sorry, but it was awesome! If this is intro to a story, I want to read this story. Oh, by the way, in the fifth stanza on ...

Run faster! Run FASTER! Youga commanded himself as he ran threw the back alleyways of Arafta. Have to get away! Youga was being chased by a member of the Mage’s ...

When it says "I couldn’t help look over at him..." do you mean "I couldn't help but to look over at him..." or "I couldn't help looking over at him..."? ...

I think it is great... for a prologue. I would have preferred it if there had been a little more of the actual action in this section, but that is ...