bear

Parts of this, namely the Gaelic and the Lugh reference, made me say "sqweee!" Unfortunately, I don't speak Gaelic. But it's nice to see. I thought that your dialogue was ...

This was gruesome. It was also confusing and hard to follow. Part of this, I think, is because you didn't have the proper spacing between your paragraphs. (Always makes things ...

This is (probably) a novel not in chapters. I'm not used to writing for an audience, but that is what this piece is intended for - an audience. I usually ...

With the step mother, it all comes down to what works best for your story. If having her as the step mother works best, for character and plot purposes, then ...

In general, I liked it. But there are a few things I want to point out in the line of cliches, and so with this critique there comes a disclaimer. ...

It's good for a start, but you have a few spelling errors and grammar mistakes. Since 'won't' is a contraction, you need the apostrophe. Also, you spelled beauty and believe ...

I thought that this was very well written. However, I disagree with Coryab222 about the description in the second part. I think it was better with less description, because the ...

Thanks for the welcome! Suzanne: I don't actually speak a foreign language yet. The closest I've come to speaking a foreign language is learning a few words and phrases in ...

I'm Bear, as you can see I'm sure. Uh, I hate making introductions. I'm on a few writing boards and I realized a few months ago that making intro's were ...