babymagic18

The heels of her red stilettos clicked against the marble flooring of the million dollar building. Her attitude was beaming with positivity but was concealed behind a warm smile that ...

This really needs some work. Capitalization and paragraphs are the big issues. It was a bit long and that drew my attention away and thats not a good thing. But ...

It was long and you don't want it to be that long that only makes readers want to skip to the end and see if that's any good. You don't ...

I was a little confused by the beggining. It was a little long and I think you could have found a way to shorten it. Other than that I think ...

Oh wow I like this alot a little long but it made me honestly want to read more. You are a talented writer I must say. Keep it up. I ...

Deep within a forest haunted by stories of death and nightmares there stands a single cottage and within this cottage live three witches of great power named Silvia, Amethyst, and ...

I have told this way to many times to people. Shorten the stories. It draws others away if it is to long and you want their attention and good review. ...

Way to long for my liking and I didn't like the start of it. A fine summers day that does not grab my attention at all. It actually sounds like ...

I didn't understand the meaning of loving someone. Sure I said I love you plenty to my mother and father but I never understood the definition of the word. There ...

This was a very good piece I must say a bit long for my taste but I will let that pass this time. I liked the way you detailed things. ...

It was okay I guess but you need work in the description area. The way you worded didn't flow and that's important in writing. If it does not flow then ...

This piece was a bit of a problem for me only b/c it was so long and that drew my attention away. You don't want that from your readers, ever. ...

This was beautiful in all honesty. You made me think that I could put a whole new depth into my pieces, I thank you for that. It was a little ...

Roberto: Now what would a pretty one such as you be doing alone such on a day as this? Sakura: There is nobody to spend time with today, everybody says ...

Oh boy this was a long one. But it was good I really liked reading it. You just have to work on making them shorter is all. I really liked ...