aspiringauthor17

Thanks! I actually did mean it to be humorous, but I probably should have had a better transition. Lindsay

Okay,there are some problems in this short narrative. First of all, you keep shifting back and forth between present and past tense. I would suggest past tense, because you are ...

I think this poem was very well written. The emotion was clear, and made the vreader feel something, which not many writers can accmplish. Good job, and keep on writing! ...

Other than a few grammar nitpicks, I think this poem is very well written. People can definitely relate to this poem because we know that most people live in their ...

I agree with a few of the critics that this could definitely be a song. Maybe you should submit it in the Lyrics section, and see if you get good ...

Wow! This is extremely good!!! And you know what, when the poetry is good, there is absolutely no need for words that are "smart"! I think you did an incredible ...

Okay, I'm Florida right now, so... Sunbathing Breathe in with a sigh, And bask in the glow Of knowing nothing can disturb you. Let out a deep breath, Feeling warm ...

Hey, Aspiring Author here- Well, you have some outstanding imagery here, but the poem definitely needs some work. For instance, what is with the dashes? Usually, commas are placed at ...

Wow, this is an excellent poem. I loved the rhythm and repetition of the successful aphoras! Great job! The emotion flowing from this poem is touching! Great transitions and visual ...

Aspiring Author here- I thought that poem was very touching. You did an excellent job of demonstrating how dramatic poetry can be used in an emotional way. I (And other ...

Wow, this poem is excellent! I am extremely impressed! You turned an ordinary history assignment into an accomplished piece of writing. I especially liked how the poem made me feel ...

This poem is very abstract, so I think you should work a bit harder on generalizing it to a certain topic. Reading the poetry, I am torn between thinking it ...

I really like this poem. You are turning tweaked sentences into verses of poetry, and that is what a true poet should do! I especially like the lines,"That passion is ...

Thanks for the comments guys! I really appreciate it! :) If you have any constructive criticism, don't hesitate to let me know! Keep on writing! ~Lindsay

Wow, I honestly don't know where to start. You are pretty much just contradicting yourself in the first line you write. If the title is Rain is Depressing , guess ...