ashleylee

All right, I have really been struggling with this story. I mean, it is something totally out of my normal range but I like to try new what the heck?! ...

Suzanne Thanks...I was trying to figure that out...I just couldn't understand why it was doing that! :? But thanks again!

This was good...but sort of confusing. Which girl is he talking about??? Who is "she" and who is "her"?? That part was super hard to follow. But the storyline was ...

Hiya…again. I know, I did all of your chapters in one day…but your story was so good…it was hard to stop reading. Which is a compliment in itself! :D Again, ...

Hello again! Here is my chapter 5-6 review! It was kind of mostly on the plot development and stuff because you really didn't make any mistakes, grammatical or with spelling. ...

Hello! This is only my second time critiquing in Advanced Critiques, so I apologize ahead of time if I don't do this right. My review is only of the first ...

WHAT?? HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO ME?? I would like to know what happens! You can’t just leave us hanging like that!!!!! Or maybe you can… -lol- :D :D ...

WOW! I don’t think I have read something that long in a very long time. I mean, how many pages was that?? But that’s beside the point. Your story was ...

Adorable! A simple boy-meets-girl-story. Now, I must admit when I first read this, I thought this was going to be a little cliché. But the ending wasn’t! Very well done! ...

This chapter was good. I think I am finally starting to understand Jayne. It also seems like you have finally gotten the hang of description. Your first paragraph was phenomenal. ...

KJ : All right! :D I'll do that! Hopefully you like it! :wink:

I just want to let everyone know that I have NEVER done anything like this before. This is totally new to me. So I know it is really rough so ...

Sam : Thanks so much! :D I have really strugged with the emotional aspect of the story, and your review really cleared things up for me! :D Thank you again!

Good! :D :D :D But I must say, the first thing that caught my attention was your tenses. You need to pick one and stick to it. You went back ...

This was great! You did really well with all the ideas with her meeting the boys. When I first read it when you PM-ed me, I thought that these boys ...