ashleylee

I loved how you showed that love can overcome anything and it isn't just about all the beauty people make it out to be. It wasn't overly done either. Just ...

Amazing! Great description with it. I could picture everything with ease. For your first work, it was awesome! Way, WAY better than most of my work! Great Job! :)

Well, here it is. My attempt at a short story. Plus, I'm writing it from a guy's point of view and so, guys, tell me if the main character sounds ...

This is a very good piece. I liked how you repeated sarah's eyes in a lot of the sentences. Also, it flowed really well and grabbed my attention from the ...

I agree that the title was eyecatching. Yours was the first one that I wanted to read! About the poem, overall, I liked it. You definitly could feel what the ...

Wonderful story. You created a beautiful picture with this. All the descriptive words you used wer wonderful. Keep Writing!

Interesting. I liked it. Very mysterious too, this guy with the feathered hat. I liked him. I'm definitely looking forward to the next chapter. Great Job! PM when you post ...

Wow! I really enjoyed this. You have excellent story telling skills. I couldn't stop reading it! Such a cool ending too. I've never read that poem but you explained enough ...

I think you could cut out "run down my cheeks". That messes up the rythem of it and when I was reading, it was hard to go to the next ...

I think I may understanding what you are trying to get across here. It is about a girl who wants this boy to notice her but all he sees is ...

I think you have a pretty good steady thought going with this but maybe try to start a line with something other than wondering. I think it makes it too ...

I thought this was really interesting. I had to think about what you were trying to say here for a little bit and I believe that's what the beauty of ...

Very descriptive and I loved the words you used to describe everything. I would love for you to make this longer but I think it's good if you keep it ...

Very mysterious and shall I say, a little alluring. There something about this that should catch people's attention right away. PM me if your going to write more.

All right, I have decided to continue with this story and I've worked on it for a bit so hopefully it's better! ** Edited Version ** ___________________________________________________________________