archer123

it was pretty good there were a couple of spelling mistakes, but other than that it was pretty good. There were some things that I didn't really agree wth but ...

it's supposted to be rasping, weezing sound.

Thanks. I will definitely rewrite this story.

It is really good. I would like to read more. :D Please pm me if you write more or if you post something new! Denisse found himself slowly falling in ...

Anna, her mother, and her two friends, Alyson and Hannah, sat silently as they drove to Anna's grandfather's house. Anna sat teary eyed and stared out at the flat landscape.Her ...

Well written. I is a lot better than the first version. I live on 92 Ledge Road in Coventry, Rhode Island. My phone number is 397-7767 Is this your real ...

It was really good. Quote "Very well but make it quick." End Quote I think you would be better off if you said, "Very well, but be quick" It make ...

Wonderful!! How about Doctor Winchester? Ohh... I did see a couple of spelling mistakes but other than that it was absolutly wonderful and I would like to read more!! :lol: ...

Blair awoke the next morning to the birds chirping over head. She crawled out of her tree and placed her fists in the small of back until it popped. She ...

Briliant. Absolutly, positvly, briliant. You are a wonderful writer. You have great descriptions. You can really picture the scenery in your mind. I felt like I was actually there. It ...

The air was cold and muggy. Everytime she took a breath it felt stiff and thick. The rain fell down around her making her midnight black hair sodden and lifeless. ...

beautiful! I loved it. I did think it was a little sad. But it was pure genius. It really makes you think about how horrible the war really is. So ...

I'm at a lose of words. All I can say is that it's wonderful. I wish I could write like that. There was really nothing to critique. you hit it ...

I think it's a wonderful story. You should go back in and critique some things like with the Moon Elves. Keep their name consistant. Be a little more descriptive. What ...

It was very well written. It was described well and you could picture the scenery in your. I think you do need to go back over it to check your ...