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Re: Foretold (Chapter 4)
NONO! No cliffhangers allowed! (I am planning to follow like this the entire story, so please bear it. :) ) Other than a few grammar mistakes, I can't really see ...
Nov 8, 2010 -
Re: When The Moon is Bigger Than The Sun
All I have to say is "amen girl-friend", you have just described the serious case of Hypergraphia. The rhyming and the words were simple, yet effective. If you want to ...
Nov 8, 2010 -
Re: At the Edge of Things
First of all, thank you sooooo much for your help! Second, I meant 'enemies' embrace' as a pair of enemies forgiving each other, and moving on, kind of the opposite ...
Nov 7, 2010 -
Re: The Villain's Hero (prologue)
haha, Thanks aweqs! I appreciate that,
Nov 7, 2010 -
Re: Foretold (Chapter 3)
I've been following this story since you posted the prologue, and I LOVE it! It's got that kind of ethereal feel to it, while also managing real relationships. It reminds ...
Nov 7, 2010 -
Re: At the Edge of Things
¡This is my first try at non-rhyming, so please feel free to pick apart as you wish. But, try and make sure to explain yourself, yeah that sounds better. :) ...
Nov 7, 2010 -
Re: A poem on the general stupidness of the human race.
I really liked this poem, it was really tragic and strong at the same time. :) My only issue is, to me it doesn't sound like... A human race poem ...
Nov 6, 2010 -
Re: Persephone's Daughter
I loved this poem! It truly feels like a greek myth, and it does explain a lot as greek myths do. I liked how it rhymed, yet, not rhymed. It's ...
Nov 6, 2010 -
Re: Broken Memories
My only issue is when you say 'metaphorical hoe.' The term just seems out of place in the 'bittersweet' of the poem. I felt the hurt, and I know how ...
Nov 5, 2010 -
Re: Secret Desire
I really liked this poem. It put to mind a storm, or some sort of busy but gorgeous chaos. A typhoon perhaps? I liked the line of 'the lines in ...
Nov 5, 2010 -
Re: The Phoenix Poem
Meh, like I said, take the advice you think is worthy. And I like my rhyming scheme, even though it is a bit amature :). I just prefer the simple ...
Nov 5, 2010 -
Re: Leader.
Meh, I try not to bag on other people's hard work, but I didn't really dig this as much as I feel as I should of. I loved the message, ...
Nov 5, 2010 -
Re: Hidden Faces (Chapter 3)
It was really good, and I appreciated how this was longer than most others. However, I do have a few nags, and these are mostly just me, sorry :). When ...
Nov 5, 2010 -
Re: Lair of Beast
Meeehhhhh... I can FEEL the potential, but it sounds like it needs to bake a little longer, know what I'm say'in? Things seemed to move a long just a little ...
Nov 2, 2010 -
Re: The Rape of Erin Aghdra
Wow, this was really cool. The tempo and the beat type are rarely heard these days, and I really appreciated the new stuff. :), my only issue was I didn't ...
Nov 2, 2010
