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Re: Please, Sir... Can I have some more reviews?
Hey Skins, can you review a short story I wrote? The Draft Thank you, I always love your reviews.
Sep 7, 2010 -
Re: The Draft
Out in the forest, there’s a small tree, just a few years old. All around it are tall oaks, as green as limes in the sun. But the small tree’s ...
Sep 6, 2010 -
Re: My Demon (Prologue)
Hi Sierra. This prolouge was actually pretty good. It set a very authentic medieval tone. I don't really like Fantasy stories, but this wasn't overly medivealish. The biggest problem though, ...
Sep 6, 2010 -
Re: Maxim: district 2 male tribute bio
Hello eranbear. Sorry to say this, but I think you've posted this in the wrong section. If you want to make a forum game set in the Hunger Games, you ...
Sep 3, 2010 -
Re: Dear...Everyone
Hey Rachel! So I know it's too late to edit for the contest, but I'll still give a review of it. I really like the idea of this letter, to ...
Sep 3, 2010 -
Re: I Wish I Could Tell You
Thanks so much for all your reviews and Likes. I tried to take your suggestions. I added another line so all the verses have four lines except the last one, ...
Aug 29, 2010 -
Re: afternoon musings
Hey, wariofart here. You're right, this really is a very strange "story". I'm not even sure how I should review it, but let me try. Sorry if this is a ...
Aug 26, 2010 -
Re: No Title Yet
Hey, wariofart here for a review. So this piece was decent. It's funny, because I just reviewed something that had the exact same set-up as this. Popular trend? When you're ...
Aug 26, 2010 -
Re: Jessica's Critique Studio ( Re-Opened )
Hey, it's cool you've opened back up! If you want, can you review my poem "I Wish I Could Tell You". Do you do poetry? Anyway, thanks in advance. (piece-by-piece ...
Aug 25, 2010 -
Re: I Wish I Could Tell You
To my human: I wish I could tell you that I love the dog food you give me, but throwing in more of the chicken ones wouldn't hurt And I ...
Aug 23, 2010 -
Re: The Almost True Life of Kimberly Ronalds #1
Hey, wariofart here. The main problem with this piece is that there's no conflict . And conflict is what makes writing a story. Right now, you're just describing yourself riding ...
Aug 19, 2010 -
Re: Of No Return Ch. One
Hello head4ever2thesky22, welcome to YWS! I'll be your reviewer for today. Overall: I thought this was a nice piece, even though it was quite short. I don't think that's a ...
Aug 18, 2010 -
Re: Plants and sun and science.
I'm totally confused by the topic for the contest, but your plot is interesting. It is very basic, with no real plot except for set-up and an ending. I like ...
Aug 12, 2010 -
Re: Is this fantasy world cliche?
First, just reading your current explanation, there seems to be little use to being either a hippie/bender (names that sound a tad iffy to me, by the way. Consider finding ...
Aug 12, 2010 -
Re: Chapter 1
Hey ChibiBear. I hope you don't mind my directness. Overall: The piece on a whole, is quite average. There's nothing really great about it, except for the surprise ending, and ...
Aug 12, 2010
