VoraciousReader_545

OMG... this is... it's wow. It's just great. It's so descriptive and I didn't expect it and just... yeah. what I mean is it rocks! :D

Everyone has pretty much said whatever there's left to critique. But I think you should continue this. It's up to you whether it's a short story or a chapter story.

I don't know if this is going to be fantasy or realistic fiction or if I'm even going to finish this. I know it's not that good but it's just ...

WOO! I'm back! *jumps around and then hits the wall and faints* My computer crashed a long time ago so I lost the site address. No one remembers me :( ...

I hate when people used 'I'. Should I just metion her name in the first paragraph? Anyway, come back to RK! No one's there :cry: ~Ashley~ :twisted:

I like it, I read your prologue awhile ago( don't remember if I critiqued it or not). I can't remember if you described Ashlee or not, but if you didn't ...

KayKay: Yeah I'm Ashley. I'm guessing you're Kayla. Anyway, Deidre is the main character so she's telling the story. Maybe I'll make the first paragraph like this instead. What do ...

I posted this on my other forum but nobody's critiqued it yet, so please critique it. anyway, it's actually Gone Away Home but I've posted it a million times, so ...

Yeah. Here it is. So critique and rate.: Deidre coughed as the ash surrounded her. “This is like a replay of what just happened at my house!” Deidre screamed, struggling ...

I finally finished editing. I took a break from it; so it took a little long. So yeah, finally. Please critique and rate.: A thick cloud of ash poured into ...

welcome PAolo. I'm Ashley. 8)

I love it! Now let's see if I can get some critique in *browses story* [ quote]You: She felt her green eyes go wide with chagrin and she looked quickly ...

I'd like to add something. I think that the death penalty is wrong because we are trying to dispose of the evil people on this earth by using hte death ...

I'd say no. Death(well killing) just makes me so sad. How exactly do they kill them? I don't know that much, about it. Do they still use the Electric Chair? ...

What's the Big Bang? :lol: