Vampirewolf3

I liked the poem, but it lacked meter. A good title might be: "Why" I'm not sure, it's not that good of a title.

Random! (-15)

Random! (-15)

I searched the web, yes?

Clear these fools from the tent so we can talk real business. Shouldn't these been in quotes? “Dmitri, please.” D-e-r-i-m-i-t-wha? (Hard to pronounce, so hard to remember). “We must do ...

Though I’d have no trouble destroying this mortal, my gut told me to keep patience. I'm sure you meant: Though I’d have no trouble destroying this mortal, my gut told ...

Hmm...April in summer...that's odd. Or maybe it's just me. I'm not good with time zones, seasons, etc. and what-not. “Autumn, this is really odd behavior when your sister has been ...

Holy cow. That is by far the best story I have ever read. However, the reader needs to feel like everything is more of a coincidence. The plot is good ...

Better now? (I guess it does take off a bit of excitement)

Thanks for the crit. I change it all now.

So...this idea blew up (like my country), so I'm going to make something up. Thats new. Hopefully. Chapter One John Blaire hugged his coat tighter as the chilling wind numbed ...

The colonel stretched the tendons of his right hand outward until they could no longer extend. In one swift motion, he balled his hand into a compacted fist, the nails ...

There are quite a bit of random symbols in your writing. What's up with that, huh? Huh?

She had cuts and bruises everywhere and her eyes were so dry from the fall that she didn’t want to open them. I don't see how eyes are dry from ...

Sure, I don't see why not. *Note: Changed some spelling/grammar errors*