Treem

Having her dad be gone might enhance the "Loner" element you've already introduced, so I say go for it. *This comment is not meant to be sassy, rude, or mean* ...

I'm not saying you shouldn't have dialogue, just maybe a bit more to the point. If you do choose to express things using dialogue then it should be filled to ...

Well written, a bit confusing at parts but otherwise good. Love indian food though.