-
Re: Welcome Home, You
The studio in downtown St. Paul was large, well-respected, and well-equipped. The front was also full of bright-eyed youngsters as new to karate as he was to teaching it. That ...
Jul 2, 2010 -
Re: the friendless punishment
I'm going to be honest with you. :) You have a great general concept here, and your vocabulary is pretty impressive too. But the way you portrayed this general concept ...
Jul 2, 2010 -
Re: The Christians' Lie
I'm fascinated with this because, even as a Christian myself, I cannot tell which end of the spectrum the writer is coming from. At first glance, it seems obvious. "Oh, ...
Jun 16, 2010 -
Re: Third Degree [Bonding with Elijah]
Mr.Knightley:(Nice s/n, btw.) I'm really interested in hearing your speculations about Jett and Phoenix. Private message me or something with them if you could! :) Also, I knew Jett referred ...
Jun 4, 2010 -
Re: Third Degree [Bonding with Elijah]
[[This is not intended to be a short story on its own. This would be an excerpt from a novel I'm working on. Any feedback appreciated.]] Late-bloomed lilacs wilted on ...
Jun 2, 2010 -
Re: Wish She Would've
Hey, thanks so much guys. I really do agree with you about the forced lengthy line. I can't remember what made me ultimately decide to stick with it, but I ...
Jun 2, 2010 -
Re: Wish She Would've
[[This isn't really finished and I'm not, by nature, a lyricist or song-writer by any stretch. It's certainly not my forte. When I do dabble in it, it all revolves ...
May 31, 2010 -
Re: Lost Chances
The idea for this story really is a cute one, and that alone kept me reading it. If I were to offer any constructive critical advice though, it would be ...
May 31, 2010 -
Re: The Ride
I didn't particularly enjoy this piece myself, and do agree with the first reviewer above that the adverbs were overused. However, I do not think that this piece is poorly ...
May 29, 2010 -
Re: Too Good For You, Too Good For Me
I agree with Yuriiko that the root cause of this rant needs to be addressed more, or you run the risk of writing something that appears to be little more ...
May 29, 2010 -
Re: He's Gone Country - excerpt
[[This is an excerpt from a story I've worked on in the past. It's a flashback of a young dad's; he and his a few years prior to the novel's ...
May 29, 2010
