Swires

What is the black, what is this poem trying to say? I felt it was a little random and carried little meaning or thought in itself. I also found it ...

on their canvas every night. Not sure if that worked. It lost the flow and beat the poem carried before hand. This poem was neither good nor bad, I see ...

I didn't like it: I think the repetition didnt carry any meaning and took all power away from the poem. In future, consider writing what your heart says - don't ...

You manage to capitvate emotion and theme with unique poetic muse, genius and personal endevour, this poem like all others ranks in the top 10 of all poems on YWS. ...

This doesnt have the look or feel of a poem - it seems more suited to prose. Perhaps this is best in the "other fiction" forum? Read through this as ...

It was melodramatic - but I think it was intended that way. I liked it, Im notsure why but I did. The only thing that perhaps needs work is imagery, ...

OK _ im proved wrong although I know a family of vegetarians that don't eat fats from animals BUT do eat milk, cheese etc.. I was stupidly basing my argument ...

Works 100% fine here.

I think Brad picked up everything - again I didnt understan anything.... just my opinion. You may want to clear things up.

Please don't take offensive about what i am going to say the poem has a nice concept but it seems a bit simple and lacks intrigue, that is only my ...

Ive nothing to add to this - it was a beatutiful poem and very meaningful - useless critique but Ive nothing to correct.

Hello there, welcome to YWS, what sort of stuff do you write? If you need a hand with anything then dont be afraid to PM me with any problems. Also ...

.. The Holocaust, the invasion of Europe, voting in a world dictator... the list could go on :)

10 0 Those are really important, especially the "I ate a bagel" one lol.

Bonjour - what do you like to write?