Swires

Being an Englishman I find nothing funny than British wit, I didn't find this witty at all.

((Again, the manuscript format paragraph style doesnt like the forums. PLease excuse untidy paragraphs)) Raptor sidled across the dead farm he and his wife owned, he cringed at the smell ...

LOL! Yes it does, the Prologue needs to be rewritten actually as before I plotted the story the prologue was already there.

Sorry I meant Whose point of view, as in which character. Yes, later on Masus background will come into light and hopefully I can change your mind. I always have ...

Thanks for the crit, Ill be sure to clean up my grammar and try and linearise(is that a word? LOL!) the time zone, they are supposed to be in sort ...

Thats one big mamma of a crit!

Yes Masus as a grown up is the main villain in a victorian type worled Fantasy I am writing. I wanted the reader to understand how he became the way ...

The Golden Compass's daemons and made them daimons Its called Northern Lights in the UK! And the acutal compass is called the Alethometre.

((Paragraphing a little messed up but here it is)) CHAPTER 1 The bullet soared past Raptor’s cheek, slicing his flesh slightly; a speck of blood splashed in his eye. He ...

"Definitely continue; I don't think anyone should tell you when to continue and when to stop. If you enjoy writing it, then do so. If you decide to post it, ...

Well if you believe in the idea then it may work. Its the VERY bare bones of it and a little cliched. Perhaps you could expand it, grow on the ...

Yes, I think my own mind must have assumed Blake would be a boy and I must have subconsciously ignored she/her etc... Yes your use of frock is correct because ...

Thanks again.

An interesting story, however at the end it seemed very confusing with all the mention of place names etc... The idea of this Runemaster interests me also. "had had" Just ...

I've preceded by comments with a "//" in your story, Ive done the first 2 chapters and may do more chapters later on, or tomorrow. __________________________________________________ The day of the ...