Snoink

Now it's not white and blue! :o What do you guys think?

Awww... if you don't want to have this reviewed, you shouldn't put this in the literary forums section. Because that's where you critique stuff! Anyway, you really really need to ...

Did I mention how awesome this is? Because it's awesome.

The greatest story I ever wrote was the one where someone told me to scrap it and start over. And I followed that advice... lol. Anyway, on to the critique. ...

I was mentioned once, seven months ago *laughs* Let's have a little fun *cracks fingers* Aetlanding and Little-Lucy (or staring at ceiling) Magnificent_Ego and Meep (Don't ask me why) That ...

I'll only allow it if Ego is added to our harem. ;)

This poem doesn't work because it doesn't have a conclusion. What did you intend to say? :?

I liked everything that was violent. Which sounds slightly sadistic, but it's true. When you described love as a beating, then it was just so much more interesting because a ...

Um... here's a somewhat simplified explanation that you might be able to understand. Basically, it's using a matrix to determine the unknown coefficients of the chemicals. My problem is basically ...

The narrator of the poem actually seems pretty biased. He's pointing out all these shallow things and then he points out to us that, lo, her heart is gold. But ...

Sue me. I thought it was a fiction story at first. So I was looking at the dialogue and the description coming with the lines with the dialogue, thinking, "Wow, ...

If I were in your shoes, I would choose a nice chocolate bar. That would be good. As it is, it is a little vague. For instance, you say that ...

...does anyone know how to do this?

It has... slightly. Because it used to be very very close and now it's not. But I have critiqued a little and so it should be closer.

Wait- why is she trying to sell her baby? Who is she selling it to? This is so CREEPY!! :( Poor, poor baby. To a publisher, of course.