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Re: The Face of the Future
Pretty stuff! :)
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: un-named
I think this part is a little clichéd: I cant afford for you to leave me I cant afford to lose my kiss from the only girl I will ever ...
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: Mark the Eyes
Yay! I like short pithy poetry. It's really pretty when it's done well. :) I thought this line was a little strange: "And you must listen." You're talking about eyes, ...
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: Heart Shaped Box (nothing to do with Nirvana)
Does this poem have anything to do with leaving childhood and becoming an adult? It's very pretty. I like the second version better. It just... looks better. But I would ...
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: The Cat And The Mongoose-II
The word "shoes" doesn't really rhyme with "mongoose" or "loose." I would look in a rhyming dictionary (you can find them online now!) to find a better word. And "butt" ...
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: a misleading love poem
As someone who has researched heroin quite a bit, I did like this poem. This has to be my favorite line: "I’m pained and I’m shivering" Nice to incorporate the ...
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: A Sestina
I have to say, it looks really fun to do, but an explanation would have been fine. Your underlining it went a little overboard... Even so, nice job. Awesome writing ...
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: Artisitc Hedonism (rated for content)
Ditto what timjim said. Also: fantasies in the mind. pushed deep in the bed, I think the period is misplaced. It gives a much better picture without it, since the ...
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: 197 BOYZ Present: The Gates
This is so totally awesome... and very catchy. Double platinum, baby!
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: Get attacked by elephants!
:elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :elephant: :e
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: Drizzle
It's an American thing then. Our books are edited so that only old books have that two quotation marks. On a side note, Spanish does it really weird. It would ...
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: A Beautiful Letdown...
Take away Switchfoot's lyrics. It really overshadows your work.
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: The Bad Review
It sucked. You should stop writing. Now. ;) Okay! I liked how you could skip over the parenthesis without ruining the poem. It did seem a bit jagged, but I ...
Jan 30, 2006 -
Re: 22222 and 40+
Wow... I can do math! Bask in my mathiness and postiness and pointiness. Especially my pointiness. I don't know if anybody knew this, but I have extemely pointy elbows. Really. ...
Jan 29, 2006 -
Re: Um... (peeking over shoulder)
Sometimes if you give your parents some of your work, they'll immediately get less nosy. XD
Jan 29, 2006