SnapesOnAPlane

I'm not a fan of the downer ending in general, but if you like it, I'd say keep it. Although I do think that you should stretch it out a ...

This was awesome =D

So pretty! =D What kind of flowers are those?

Like! Off the bat though: she’d been disappointed to see that it was only numbers – until she realized that in fact a link. I think that should probably be ...

I like how the Android has a sassy personality. She's not what you'd expect. So, do the citizens know that Androids exist, or have they been kept under wraps? I'm ...

Oh wow, this is great =D I'm a sucker for semi-totalitarianistic futuristic stories, and this one's off to a great start. I'll be reading more.

Thanks for the comments! =D The name is intentionally long. It's intended to be a parody on those ridiculous shoujo magical girl stories, that almost always seem to have long ...

Honestly? I noticed a lot of resemblance to Harry Potter. And not in a good way.

I've been there before. It's funny how people can get so wrapped up in technology. Anyway, I thought it was nice. Funny, well paced, and the characters seemed natural with ...

Wow. That's really all I can say. The build up was perfect, I had an inkling earlier in the chapter what might be up, but I didn't know for sure ...

Sad, but pretty. I liked it. The rhyme scheme was odd, but I'm not sure if that was a stylistic choice or not.

I liked the sort of...social commentary, I want to call it, of the desensitized boys watching the couple argue. It really said a lot, without actually saying a lot. And ...

A bit too much dialogue for my taste, I think there should be some non-speaking parts in there, particularly to break up the flow of dialogue. I was also confused ...

This was for a contest at Advanced . The theme was a self-portrait, so I decided to spice it up a bit and create a fauxcomic about myself.

I like the idea going here, but it felt a bit rushed to me. I would keep the beginning as is, but when she wakes up I would stretch it ...