Smoo

Cool concept, with the dual personalities, but it was extremely confusing! You kept using "I" for two people, and I couldn't keep up with who was talking at what point. ...

Hmm... Alright, I'm a little confused as to the politics... So there's obviously several clans, but only one rules the country, and a tournament decides the head clan. Interesting. I ...

I like it! I can't resist a story about a boy and his dog. You used especially good imagery and word choice. It makes for a believable mood considering the ...

Nice start, laying out the main character's feelings, however, she seems a bit shallow. Some complaints... In the second sentence, you used the word "drunkenly". I'm not even sure if ...