SeraphTree

Interesting point :D But then, why do we associate death with men too? ;) I understand what your saying, but think about it like this: If you hadn't pointed out ...

Allo Ari. :D There were a couple of things I noticed... It’s hard to realize just how much you’re missing until it’s gone. This sounds unfinished :D Please reword. I ...

:D:D Since I'm in the neighborhood.... Ice. Cold agaisnt my hard feet but yet not bothersome. The harsh wind was at my back and racing past my ears, blocking all ...

Well, there was a few things I noticed. :D This one is planning to propose to his girlfriend tonight, this one was tragically widowed a few months ago This is ...

It's good, but a little confusing in some parts. “I have me,” He pointed out. “Exactly.” This is too vague. I have no idea what you mean by this. “Do ...

:D I could already taste the meat in my mouth, but that moment was soon to be ruined. There was a horrific smash to my side, which started bleeding, the ...

Thanks Koko. I'll see what I can do :D

Good thing I added them :D:D:D:D:D:D:D Do you need any other work to be critted?

I'm not sure Ducky. I think it's good the way it is. I mean, since she doesn't specifically state who the person is, people can make that person whoever they ...

Thanks everyone! Well, this IS a poetic response to something else. :D Uh, I don't see how 'bird' and 'absurd' sounds awkward. :D

You're welcome. I was trying to be helpful:D:D:D:D:D

You need to space between paragraphs, including dialogue. As soon as you do that, I will crit :D

You need to space between paragraphs :D A couple things :D she fit snuggly in the palm of his hand Okay, she is REALLY small. I mean, like months premature ...

:D:D:D Father, curled up in a womb I understand that this is the child, but I'm confused about your imagery of the father's demons. What are they? We need more ...

Sparrow ** Many wander the path, You think you tread alone. Don’t conceal this wrath- Don’t stumble on this stone. * Many drift, many are lost- The sea of life ...