SeraphTree

Just a few things I noticed :D I open my eyes to see a man cloaked in white fire. His clothes are white (white as the moon that spits waves ...

OH... I see. XD Wow........... :D

I was thinking plot. The thing is, I don't know very much about that sort of novel, so that's why I'm reading them. :D:D:D

What up Author ^o^V The train rolled up and he knew he could get on it, it wasn’t the train he was waiting for, but if he got on it ...

This is a lot of telling. I wake up in a car. She’s playing radio static again. Grey everywhere. Turn it down, I tell her. She turns it down. I ...

:D “She can’t stay here with us Alice,” said a voice angrily. The person who is presumably Alice began to speak. “But she cannot simply stay with Naomi, she is ...

Whoa, sorry about that. *smacks myself for being lazy* Anyway... :D What?” I cried out disbelievingly. 'Cried out' sounds a bit over done. I stomped to the door and opened ...

I want to write a novel similar to Jane Austin and Emily Bronte's work, but I don't want to lose my voice. I am currently reading Wuthering Heights, but I'm ...

I will crit this. :D It's just that... it's really late up here. :( :D:D:D

YW. :D:D:D:D I'm glad I could help :D

My relationship with Jenny Chase wasn’t what you could even call a relationship. It was pretty much a hate-love-hate friendship…only without the love. Our rivalry started in eighth grade art ...

No, it's good that it was posted. I mean, when I post my work, I KNOW there are things that are little off, but I just can't see them. That's ...

Ditto... white flag!!!!! :D Just kidding. I must agree with Sydstix and xHearts. There is nothing that really grabs us in the beginning. :( There are a couple things bugging ...

I will crit this later. :D I have some stuff to do :D

We need more background of your character. A flashback would be perfect. Also, this sounds a bit too much like 'poor me' writing. :( Maybe some of her strengths instead ...