Sasha

Hey, glad you posted the first chapter. but she didn't confront the people, the way she would've if she had been herself. The last part of this is awkwardly worded. ...

(a man sufferingfrom post traumatic stress) I don't know much about post traumatic stress disorder; from what I saw here you did a pretty good job of showing it. But, ...

Thanks for PMing me! Hero and the chocolatewritingcat caught most of the nitpicks. You have some awkward phrases in here, but if you read over this once or twice, I'm ...

Hello and welcome to YWS! First, you should go on over to the Welcome Forum, introduce yourself, and read the rules. We have a 3:1 review to work ratio here. ...

Hey and welcome to YWS! Jetpack made a very good point about the dialogue tags. They're good in moderation, but when you overuse them, they tend to bog down your ...

*claps* Yay it's up! I watched my feet as they silently stepped along the sidewalk. So this sentence just doesn't sound right to me. I've read it out loud and ...

You know what I hate? When mom comes down to do her laundry and pokes her head in my door and asks what I’m doing. “Writing,” I say. “Writing what?” ...

Sorry I got to this a little late. Okay, well the reviewers above me got most of the "errors". There isn't much to correct grammar/spelling wise. Overall, this was a ...

I think you have a very good idea here (I tried writing something similar a long time ago). Anyway, this could be expanded on. How does Ryan put thoughts in ...

Verrry interesting. I really liked the ending. It was so unexpected. The beginning can be worked on, though. Honestly, it just starts out like any other breakup story. Work on ...

Hey, I'm just going to jump right into the review! “What are you doing after school?” Not the best beginning. It didn't really draw me into the story. To be ...

Ooooo exciting stuff! We reached the station quicker then ten minutes We reached the station in under ten minutes. One of them got my eye as I passed and grinned, ...

Hey, the title caught my eye and I thought this would be a very interesting read. :smt002 Does it catch you? As of now: not really. You didn't have a ...

Wow! I'm glad you posted the second chapter so quickly. Okay, onto your review. "Wake up, Link" I growled, shoving Link's small, tangled body fiercely. He gave a small cry ...

Hello! I could relate to this poem on so many levels. You never loved me. This line seems out of place. It doesn't really fit in with the rest of ...