Saphirra

thanks!

I think that the beginning of the story doesn't really do much to draw the reader in, but it certainly gets interesting as the story goes on. i like the ...

Obviously, this is the sixth entry of mine. please, please review and submit! the buttons don't bite! :D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Where exactly are we going?” I asked Marc th

Wow. just wow. you made the person seem real, with his own set of morals, balances between good and bad, needs, thoughts and worries. it really makes the story come ...

I really liked this. it was interesting and mysterious, and i waned to know more about what happened. A really good thing i noticed you did was make the boys ...

This time, the hotel was nice, and far from the airport in Nice, where we had landed. We were finally here, after much mind control and persuasion to let us ...

I really liked the way this kept me wanting to read more and see what happened. you captured the essence of how this woman (girl?) was conflicted, but you never ...

I think that this is cool, the way that you are proud and unashamed of how you feel. I'm not bi or anything, but i totally support you. i think ...

He stopped then, as though he had run out of steam. He looked at Caitlin and me, and then said bitterly, “You wanted to know, now you do. Hope you’re ...

“Ughh.” I sat up, then registered that I wasn’t in my bedroom. I looked around, and saw that it was a sparsely furnished hotel room, with tacky wallpaper. Marc and ...

thanks everyone!

cool! you are my age, which is a first so far for me in this place. then again, i joined yesterday, so thats not saying much! Feel free to critique ...

I agree with the others about the beginning. What bearing does the poem have on the actual story? Why is Bordwick reading it to his colleagues? What field does he ...

I like you're plot, but the speed at which things happens makes it harder to understand then if you just spaced it out. Also, i think you really need to ...

Like it says in the first post, this is my first chappie, and i'm only 13, so go easy please! But don't hesitate to tell me how i can make ...