SOPF

Thanks guys for the replies. By the way my name is Daniel not David but atleast you remembered the D. Anyway, I'm glad to see the positive feedback. I know ...

Wut up Kirstybee, welcome to YWS. I'm pretty new myself but if you ever need a critique just PM me. I got the same overly active inspiration thing going on, ...

I think the two replies before me got most of what Is was going to say. One thing that kind of bothered me though was that you didn't give me ...

This is a continuation from where I left off in the first part. IMO this is the better portion of the prologue. I hope you enjoy it. * * * ...

This story was pretty entertaining. It kept my interest and I usually have the attention span of a child plagued with ADHD (and not the false cases which allow the ...

Thanks Alainna, I made the changes you suggested all except for the first one. "such a thing is truly symbolic of the deeds I have caused" the only reason I ...

IMO the storyline is much more important than grammar amd punctuation so I didn't look for any errrors in that sense, but as for your story...... It's pretty original. I'm ...

Good story. I like Pikara's personality. The only problem was some occasional infodumping but there wasn't that much so it's all good. I hope to read the next chapter.

Squallz thanks for the critiquing. Well, the reason I haven't tried to give the reader a connection to Bellin yet is because this story isn't about him but about his ...

Wii

Sorry about so many repeated posts. I posted these from my Nintendo Wii and it wouldn't tell me whether or not this post got through so I kept posting it. ...

SOPF actually is an acronym for Son of Pure Fire, but you can just call me SOAP if you want. Oh, and I can't stand elves and dwarves because of ...

This is the first part to the prologue of "The Tales of Arc" a rough draft for a book I'm writing. Critiquing and feedback as to how compelling, or not, ...

Yeah, unlike your chapter one, this chapter lacked a bit in description, although specifying which hand his rolex was on was unnecessary IMO. The characters still need some depth but ...

I'm not very skilled at critiquing Imperfectlyperfect, but, being that I enjoyed our conversation in the chat room, I'll try to help you out. Note:I didn't search for grammar or ...