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Re: Cruel Eyes Ch-2
I woke up to gentle fingers brushing my hair from my face. I trued to sit up, wincing when pain shot up my body. "Lay down." A male voice said ...
Apr 19, 2011 -
Re: Water Under The Bridge Chapter Two: Anna
This was amazing! I didn't see any major errors. Brooklynn and I watch in disgust as a greasy square of meat goes on a ghostly-white bun, a plastic piece of ...
Apr 16, 2011 -
Re: Heartbreak
This is so sad! It even made me cry a little. It was very good, but there were a few errors. "You know just in case anything happens to me ...
Apr 16, 2011 -
Re: Water Under The Bridge Chapter One: Shawn
For the most part it flowed very well, though there were a few off-the-wall statements. try to put more details into it. try answering question like, what does the narrator ...
Apr 16, 2011 -
Re: Cruel Eyes Ch-1
Vendela Belladona is dead. I am Vendela Belladona. So just to make everything clear, I, Vendela, am dead. I can remember everything about the day of my death with perfect ...
Apr 16, 2011
