Rei

That is true, Nate, but I still see a difference in that respect.

My high school years were really depressing, so I skipped a lot. Not so much that I would end up failing my subjects. But I did enough to take a ...

Yeah, in a lot of cases the term African American is kind of odd. I mean, we don't call white people whose family have been on this continent since slavery, ...

Because the bee in my brain told me to.

You've got a fascinating style. Really well-written. If this really is true, I hope everything works out for you.

And that's one thing I like about Canada. People are encouraged to keep their own culture at the same time as joining the culture that already exists. My friend Nhan ...

The tone really didn't suit this. The dialogue was good. It sounded real, but the narrative didn't. When you're writing in first person, the narrative should sound the same as ...

Definitly a good effort if you haven't been writing poetry for long. Personally, I didn't like the rhythm too much, but the ideas were good, though that doesn't mean it's ...

Not bad. The dialogue could be a little better to sound a little more natural (But I'm waay to picky about that, so don't take that too seriously) The overall ...

Well, I just got accepted into two colleges. One for Teacher's Aide and one for Library technician. But I really want to publish my novels and win the world fantasy ...

Not bad, but kill the prologue. I really don't think you need it. There are much better ways of getting out that exposition.

I hope I don't sound really whiny, but why are so many people looking at this but not replying? I really could use some feedback.

Not bad. I would definitely encourage developing the idea a little more, though I don't have any siggestions at the moment. Grammar note: "What's that?" he asked. Not "What's that?" ...

Please. Break it up into shorter chapters. This is far too long to be one chapter. And actually, if you click edit, you can add to the piece directly rather ...

It needs more than dialogue.