RandomGrrl

Blood Brother I knew you once, I knew you twice. All my life I thought you were nice. I didn’t ever try to pretend, You were more or less then ...

Eh... still has the "Its" vs. "It's". But that's all the constructive crit I can give, I think. The descriptions were beautiful and vivid, I really enjoyed them. Oh, hey, ...

Really bittersweet and intriguing, but so short! I think this would make a great beginning for something you could lengthen... however, if you want to leave it like this, it's ...

Darn... Just realized I've brought up another month old post... Sorry everyone! :D

Wow wow wow! Great. I can't find a thing to crit!

I liked the simplicity, but a little... detail... please? Also, first thing I noticed (as in, before I could even finish the first stanza) was the distracting caps. I mean, ...

I would have to agree with Cade that the subject of writer's block is highly overused. However, since you've written the poem already :)... It seemed to me that the ...

Wow, I loved this! I like things with a twist, and this had it. I agree with the others that you should cut the first stanza... It just doesn't flow ...

Cute cute cute, Jabber! Nice and light, not like some poetry (I'm such a hypocrite, just posted like the saddest poem I've written... well, sad for me...). I really enjoyed ...

Cute cute cute, Jabber! Nice and light, not like some poetry (I'm such a hypocrite, just posted like the saddest poem I've written... well, sad for me...). I really enjoyed ...

I loved most of this, the emotion is really powerful, but there were sections that didn't seem to fit very well. It seemed that you couldn't decide whether you wanted ...

Thanks. I fixed that mistake in the punctuation. I think I'm just going to go with my gut and leave it that way, even if it only appeals to those ...

Thanks for the help! I've made some changes... Is it better?

If ya have cereal you're a) less likely to get Mad Cow disease or some other infection carried by unclean meat. b) ya won't have to waste money on gas, ...

If ya have cereal you're a) less likely to get Mad Cow disease or some other infection carried by unclean meat. b) ya won't have to waste money on gas, ...