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Re: Don't let me fall
I liked this one. If I let go, even a little bit. For some reason, when I think of 'holding on' and 'letting go'...'a little bit' doesn't quite fit there...maybe ...
Feb 22, 2008 -
Re: Halo: The Fight Worth Fighting
Guess who's finally gonna crit your stuff???? lol Critting as I go, bro: But before he neared the Ghosts, a group of Banshee fliers came to intercept him and his ...
Feb 14, 2008 -
Re: Neko Ninja 1
Hello! I'm going to crit this as I read it: I walked up to Tsunade's paper covered desk. If you wanna say it this way, I think that 'paper' and ...
Feb 14, 2008 -
Re: Star Wars: Darth Bane-Path of Destruction
Hello, again. ^_^ A few weeks ago I read Star Wars: Darth Bane-Path of Destruction, a Old Republic novel, by Drew Karpyshyn. This book was about Darth Bane, obviously. It ...
Feb 13, 2008 -
Re: Star Wars: Tales from the New Republic
Hello. Recently, I read another (gasp) Star Wars book, which was actually a collection of short stories which were previously published in the Star Wars Adventure Journal. Tales from the ...
Feb 13, 2008 -
Re: Lone Survivor
Hey all. I just finished reading this great book called Lone Survivor. It was pretty awesome. It's by Marcus Luttrell, a Navy SEAL. Okay, this book is about Navy SEAL ...
Feb 13, 2008 -
Re: Through the Still Night-Chapter 1
I fixed it so now there are compound sentences and that part isn't so random. :D :D ~Timea
Jan 19, 2008 -
Re: Through the Still Night-Chapter 1
Domo arigato, Joel and Audra! :D Jonin is like Genin, Joel, 'cause its a title and a rank. I'm not sure if they really should be capitalized (like chakra isn't)...but ...
Jan 17, 2008 -
Re: Through the Still Night-Chapter 1
Through the Still Night: Chapter 1: The Path of the Shinobi Shinobi must travel the path of what they know is right. A true shinobi feels the best when he ...
Jan 15, 2008 -
Re: Paper clips and rubber bands
Hey Alice. You tried to fix me way too fast You didn’t know it was sugar glass Sorry, I really getting tired of 'suger glass'. :( Find the superglue tonight ...
Jan 12, 2008 -
Re: Baby's Lullaby
Hey Jabbs. It's very repetative. I don't really like repetative. Just an opinion. It's really long... I only read about the first five verses, because I got bored of it. ...
Jan 12, 2008 -
Re: Forget you
Hey Alice. I agree with Doctor Clicky. and Kalliope about the contradictory thing. I also really don't like how you repeat the chorus way to much. It sounds a little ...
Jan 12, 2008 -
Re: Save me today
Hey Catriona. Nice job. I really, really liked it. I can actually sorta hear this. Many days I’ve wandered, many days I’ve strayed I’m about to fall off the edge, ...
Jan 12, 2008 -
Re: Save me
Hey Alice. First off, you say that the narrator's heart loves the darknes...then you say it needs light...and then if she/he falls leave him/her there. That's kinda contradictory in my ...
Jan 12, 2008 -
Re: Life!!!
It's really short and kinda strong.... I should be longer... Sorry >.< I don't really like this. ~Psychic
Jan 12, 2008
