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  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: Heaven

    Thanks for the comment. Due to the topic, little word changes can change a lot of the meaning. The reason I have has instead of had is because I don't ...

    Aug 11, 2011
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: Heaven

    Thanks for the review. It is more of a piece about wisdom and how wisdom is the primary goal. Also, some of the corrections you suggested would change the intended ...

    Aug 11, 2011
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: Heaven

    "From A to B, I tell you. Yes, from A to B." "From 1 to 2?" "Yes, from 1 to 2." "..." "Symbols. Lines on a page." "And if I ...

    Aug 11, 2011
  • Fantasy Short Stories Re: If only (contest entry)

    I thought that your descriptions were pretty good and the story works under the guidelines of the prompt. You misspelled quite a few words, though, and had some grammar mistakes. ...

    Aug 10, 2011
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: Whispering Hope

    I think that one of the biggest problem younger writers have is beginning and ending a writing piece. I felt that your beginning was pretty solid, but I have a ...

    Aug 10, 2011
  • Other Poetry Re: Music and misery

    I feel like a lot of people can relate to this quote: ‘Love wasn’t meant for me, I got better things to go on for’

    Aug 10, 2011
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: It's not all crystal clear

    I don't think this is the easiest topic to write about, but I think you did a pretty good job. One suggestion, though. I would leave out the Thank you, ...

    Aug 10, 2011
  • Romantic Short Stories Re: Oscar was a ripped umbrella

    I think your descriptions are quite good. I would break it down into more paragraphs, though. The descriptions and lack of paragraphs make it seem very dense. Also, noticed a ...

    Aug 10, 2011
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: The Parting

    The Parting Act I (A man is sitting with his eyes closed and legs crossed in the middle of a square clearing in the woods. He wore a long tattered ...

    Aug 9, 2011
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: I. Freakin. Hate you.

    Hey, I thought the story was quite good overall. There are some things I noticed that i would fix, though. In Finally it was the week of the play. I ...

    Aug 9, 2011
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: A Dying Fire

    I like your writing style, but I think your particular style would benefit from the use of dashes. For example, in The light was so bright, even filtered through the ...

    Aug 9, 2011
  • Fantasy Short Stories Re: The King's Curse

    By the other side, the Fallen Angel granted the king an empty book, he claimed that whoever who writes on it; thoughts, time and death itself would move to fulfil ...

    Aug 9, 2011
  • Writing Tips Re: Writing in 3rd person

    J.M. Coetzee writes in a really good third person style that is similar to a first person style. I suggest taking a look at Disgrace .

    Aug 8, 2011
  • Fantasy Short Stories Re: Nostalgia

    I really enjoy your writing style. I think you would be able to write good works of literary realism.

    Aug 7, 2011
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: Office Beauty (150 words)

    I would cut off the last two sentences. The rest of the story kind of implies them.

    Aug 6, 2011


I'm tired of books having villains who are just villains for no reason.
— EllieMae