Palip

The Amphisabaens stayed hidden behind the tower which loomed over the gigantic trees of the forest, and, being as wide as 3 Lesden trees, their cover was well hidden. Adrastos, ...

It's a good story, but you really need to describe the people into big detail. How old r they? Where is the story taking place? How old is Jessica? What ...

You have one heck of a story here....you mind creates unique imagination the kind of which rarely is ever seen. However, you could do with giving more detail of the ...

Is this just the first chapter? Are you going to continue writing? If so, what's the name of the story? P.S. You could do with erasing d bad words for ...

Yes, it is quite a good story, but as people pointed out, you overdid it with the elipses...otherwise, very good job :)