Narnialover4ever1

Great job! I LOVE it so far!!!

Good job with the dialouge! I really like your story so far!! :D

'But we talked about that. We talked about us. He admitted he'd missed our close friendship as much as I had, and was eager to continue rejuvenating it after tonight. ...

The dialoge needs a little working on. I LOVE it though :) great job!!

Great job with the beginning! I loved it! Your doing a great job with the story! Keep up the great work :)

Really good! I enjoyed it a lot! I've read the other chapters but I like this one the best :D

:D Good job describing things :) 'The run wasn’t much of a sweat to him. He ran around the track with ease and met up with the other boys, who ...

Very good! This story is so great! Your doing a great job :)

Your dialoge is very good! I'm enjoying this story! 'Know this, Zavier. The palace is Timmy’s only hope to live a full life. Deep secrets are buried within those walls, ...

Very cool! I liked this chapter best :) 'The ocean. It is weeping mother. It is so lonely.” A pained look flashed across mother’s face, but it was gone as ...

Great job! You really expressed the emotion! The title is good too! Made me want to press on it :D Keep writing!

Good job! It was really deep and emotional! I loved it!

Hey! Great job! You were great expressing your feelings using words. The melody fit in quite nicely with the words. I liked it!

Great first chapter! I liked it a lot! Can't wait till chapter 2 :D

I LOVED IT! You are great at describing and expressing the words! Keep up the good work!