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Re: Adrianople
Green = Comment/Correction Blue = Suggestion Black = Review * Agon stared across the dark plains of his fathers farm. You need an apostrophe there as the farm belongs to ...
Jan 4, 2007 -
Re: Howling Meow Cats and Other Creatures of the Night
Sam, why didn’t you continue this? The titles from the book are craving to be explained, I especially like How To Cure an Eccentric Coughing Pig Bite ;) I like ...
Dec 22, 2006 -
Re: Opus Irae
Green = Comment/Correction Black = Review * A bullet through the black night, he was almost undetectable, diving out of the paths of owls and bats that shared the sky. ...
Dec 22, 2006 -
Re: Fissures of the Earth.
Green = Comment/Correction Blue = Suggestion Black = Review Sometimes they can be right, and are halfway decent people, but mostly they are just moronic jerks . Aren’t ‘morons’ and ...
Dec 22, 2006 -
Re: Blankshire Abbey
Green = Comment/Correction Blue = Suggestion Indigo = Quote Black = Review * Ahoy Sir Trident, seeing no replies I managed to do something that looks like a critique (if ...
Dec 21, 2006 -
Re: SUN AND MOON
Green = Comment/Correction Black = Reviw * I looked up from the green piece of paper that I had been doodling on into the sarcastic eyes of an unfittingly short ...
Dec 20, 2006 -
Re: Marco Polo
Green = Comment/Correction Blue = Suggestion Black = Review * Hello! This is not historical fiction, it belongs in science fiction. Also, use spacing as this is all a solid ...
Dec 20, 2006 -
Re: The End.
Green = Comment/Correction Blue = Suggestion Black = Review * The filthy pile of humanity stirred, awakened by the stream of light even now illuminating their prison; their home. Wouldn’t ...
Dec 19, 2006 -
Re: Distance
Green = Comment/Correction Blue = Suggestion Black = Review * Today was Saturday, but Sangha came to work today, anyways . ‘anyways’ = anyway Camilla led Makata to the Viewing ...
Dec 19, 2006 -
Re: Ark
Green = Comment/Correction Blue = Suggestion Black = Review * On November 17, 9999 young Simon Baxter rode home on the hover bus. In his seat television he watched bioball ...
Dec 19, 2006 -
Re: Story of Suspense
Green = Comments/Correction Blue = Suggestion Black = Review * I woke up in a room, I hope. I don’t know what you wanted to say here, why did you ...
Dec 19, 2006 -
Re: Nameless
Green = Comment/Correction Black = Review * Once of them was still sprawled there, oozing. ‘once’ = one This was a little... weird. I liked the beginning when the moon ...
Dec 18, 2006 -
Re: Citrus [working title]
Green = Comment/Correction Blue = Suggestion Black = Review * Lime had grown up in the city all his life. A little awkward at first, I think you meant he ...
Dec 18, 2006 -
Re: Re:Freshed/Re:Cycled
Green = Comment/Correction Blue = Suggestion Black = Review * Wot cheer, Fish? ;) The bright lights flickered on and off erratically, the harsh glare stinging Cray’s eyes. It had ...
Dec 15, 2006 -
Re: A Halloween Story
Green = Comment/Correction Blue = Suggestion Black = Review * The night was as it always was, dark and so cold. The fog was thicker than it usually was on ...
Dec 15, 2006
