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Mossyra

  • Fantasy Novels Re: Reemergence 3

    Chapter Three Zack ran through the forest, terrified. Behind him, he clearly heard the shouts of his pursuers, and he dared not stop for a moment; instead he carried on, ...

    Aug 1, 2010
  • Action/Adventure Short Stories Re: One Eye Open

    It was excellently written, but with a few punctuation and spelling errors. Also, a little nitpicking--there are 52 weeks in a year, not 48. For the spelling, it was just ...

    Jul 30, 2010
  • Welcome Mat Re: Greetings!

    Thanks! Wow, lots of questions. My favorite color is blue, my favorite book changes just about every time I read a book, favorite movie is a similar problem, and most ...

    Jul 29, 2010
  • Fantasy Novels Re: Elemental Thirteen (Rewrite) Chapter 1

    An interesting beginning, and well-written. The only thing I really noticed was that you usually leave out commas when one person directly addresses another, such as “Doing what sweetie?” and ...

    Jul 29, 2010
  • Fantasy Novels Re: Reemergence 2

    Chapter Two The man stepped forward gracefully, his sword gleaming in the moonlight. The young girl stumbled backward, her mind racing for a way to escape, but she came up ...

    Jul 29, 2010
  • Fantasy Novels Re: .

    It definitely needs some revision, mostly just stuff a good proofread will fix, but I like it. Some awkward phrasing, fragmented sentences, and a little bit of repitition, to be ...

    Jul 29, 2010
  • Lyric Poetry Re: Shadows

    It sounds good, but I'm not quite sure of one or two places. One example is: The real only one thing they desire... This should probably be written as "The ...

    Jul 29, 2010
  • Fantasy Short Stories Re: Up From The Deep

    This is great! Excellent story structure, well thought out, and a good flow to the story. I like how you change some phrases to fit better, like "shrimping out" instead ...

    Jul 29, 2010
  • Welcome Mat Re: Greetings!

    Hi! I'm new here. I've been writing for four years, but I'm still trying to figure out my style and make my stories work, so I tinker and change things ...

    Jul 29, 2010
  • Fantasy Novels Re: Reemergence

    This is a story I'm working on, and I'm still tinkering with it; any suggestions or criticisms are welcome. Thank you! Prologue They were a story, told to restless children ...

    Jul 29, 2010


Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.
— Mark Twain