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Re: The Shifters (part one)
Hi! So, as I was reading through I saw a lot of grammatical errors which made it a bit confusing for me to read. I'll focus on this particular section: ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: Twisted Vines
Hello! I have to agree with what JabberHut was saying: you use a bit too much description. Readers need some description, but not too much as too much description turns ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: *KNOCK KNOCK* Hello? : )
Hi Starlight9! I'm Miracles, no points for figuring that out. :D Welcome to this site, I guess. I hope you like it here. I know I do. :) Although I'm ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: Ubiquitous Introductions
Hello! I'm Miracles. First thing's first, welcome to YWS. I hope you like it here. :) Seems as though I've stumbled upon something potentially wonderful and useful. Yes, yes you ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: My YWLJ Entry *Fixed*
Hi there! First off, I have no idea how to use gimp, so I probably won't be able to go down to the technicalities of it all. But I can ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: Depressed- why try?
Hi there! I'm not a big fan of the paragraphing you've got there. I think that you can separate it into stanzas and lines to make it look more like ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: Hey, I'm new and would love to know more people on here:)
The book sounds interesting. I'd like to read it someday, tell me when/if you're going to post it up 'kay? I'll go and have a read.
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: Balloons
Hi! This is a sweet, simple story that you've written. If anything, I think it's a bit too simple. The complication wasn't all that big and the characters ended up ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: The dream is real
Hello, First of all, I don't think that you have written the story to it's full potential. A plunging plane, for example is probably a whole lot more scarier than ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: The Camping Trip
Hello! So, I noticed that you labelled the part where the flashback was about to happen. That's a bit like saying: Caution! Awesome paragraph right below. You don't do that, ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: Open Roads
Hi JackpotJohnson, As the previous reviewer have mentioned starting on a new line everytime someone new speaks, I won't go say anymore about that, except that you pay attention to ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: He Remembers
Hi! I have to say, this is a really, really sweet story. The emotions in it is so raw, which makes us, readers, feel for the character. I also liked ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: Secrets of the seed
Hi AmeliaCogin! Like the previous reiewers have said, this is a really god poem. And as it's so good, I don't have much constructive criticsm, but I'll tell you why ...
Jun 26, 2011 -
Re: Save My Soul
Hello! There's some grammatical errors here that stands out quite a bit for me. Save my soul O, y ou charmed boy Tell me what you see, When you look ...
Jun 25, 2011 -
Re: Hey, I'm new and would love to know more people on here:)
Hiya! Welcome to the site. It's great to see that you like this site already. :) The book you're working on sound interesting. What's it about? I'd love to read ...
Jun 25, 2011
