MeadowLark

This was pretty cool. Suspenseful and everything, but ya if its a vampire story I won't continue reading the next parts. Sorry. Vampire stories annoy me. But I'll point some ...

The description in your story was wonderful. It was one of the things I noticed immeaditely. Also, the way you captured the little girl's innocence and the darkness ahead was ...

This was pretty cool. It's always cool to read stories where at least one character can see ghosts. But I agree with Ms.Dream up there. You need a little more ...

This was very interesting and I enjoyed it greatly. Well I usually enjoy anything I read anyways but...I found a few small mistakes. ‘Take my child, he name is Cara. ...

Hi there! I'm not very good when it comes to criticing but I'm gonna try my best. First off, it seemed quick and I got confused at parts. I think ...

I enjoyed this chapter very much yeah, a lot of info dumping. I also noticed some mistakes so I'll just point them out to you: “I’m just worry about you ...

If this was a book I found in the bookstore I'd buy it lol. No kidding, I'm serious! Kingdoms of Chocolate and Vanilla, that's great. But poor Danny, like ouch! ...

I can't wait for your help! Thanks for wanting to do it niccy! I appreciate it so much and sorry it's so long. I hadn't realized it when I posted ...

Thanks to Haruno Sakura for a wonderful suggestion, I fixed that little nit-pick and shortened it. I hope it is much easier to review (although to my luck it's still ...

It was great! I was immeadielty hooked! I haven't read a story, though it is only a prologue at the moment, that realed me in that fast. I can't even ...

It was good, I enjoyed reading it. It had me hooked and everything but, like the others above wrote, the villians are a cliche type (sorry). And the protagonist? Who ...

Hey thanks for all the critic! I really honestly apprectiate it. I'm not a poet (that's my sisters job lol). I fixed up a bit so perhaps I should post ...

I would like to thank niteowl, *writewatiwant* and Princess for their wonderful tips. Thank-you so much!! I tried my hardest to fix this poem up and I got rid of ...