MamaLama95

I think it's a brilliant idea that you executed fairly well. There were some little nitpicks here and there, but the previous comments have covered pretty much all of them, ...

I don't mean this to sound harsh, but it's clear that this is the first time you've written this sort of thing. It's not a bad poem, by any means, ...

This was really powerful, and emotional. Two nitpicks; Where she sees chunky hips, others see bones sticking out of her body, internally piercing her flesh. Where she sees large legs, ...

There was a lot of powerful emotion, and you did a good job of making it flow very well; however, I think that at the start it wasn't clear enough ...

This was quite good - you used a lot of clear, good, visualise-able imagery, and it flowed quite well. Another thing you did which impressed me was the way you ...

This wasn't half bad - I don't think the last line of the first stanza fits, no matter how much I love the use of the word detoxification. Also, you ...

This poem is emotional and it has a certain eloquent depth to it, but on the downside, the lack of meter when using a rhyme scheme just seems a little ...

I do agree with 567ajt about the abruptness of certain lines. In general, I think the poem is wonderful - reflective, emotional, spiritually fascinating at times and extremely well-constructed. The ...

I quite liked this, and you reflected the way I perceive today's generation almost perfectly. One thing that did bother me was the fact that you used correct grammar and ...

I don't think anyone needs anymore thanks to you - very nice descriptive pieces and some of the lines were really powerful. I do think you dragged it out a ...

The last line was absolutely fantastic. I actually loved it so much that I'm going to overlook all the little grammar or punctuation nitpicks. The poem in general was quite ...

You did rely on rhyming a lot, and as a result, some of it was forced. Some light advice; if by the third stanza you can't come up with a ...

Very nice message, good theme, I liked the way you didn't punctuate everything, just the 'He's'. It added a dramatic and emphatic effect; little nitpicks. His chest inhales in - ...

Karzkin picked up on pretty much all the grammar and punctuation nitpicks that I might have had, so I'll be brief. It was quite nice at the beginning, then it ...

You literally could not have written this at a better time. Well done my friend.