LynnB

Okay, first of all I think you are off to a great start. You obviously have a very clear picture in your mind of what the Underworld looks like. However, ...

Hey pyro (ahem)! I like that you quickly draw the reader into what's happening, even with the title. I was quickly wrapped up in the plight of the hunter, his ...

It's obvious that this was written with a lot of pain in mind, the kind of pain that most everyone is familiar with. I think your choice of language was ...

Hey! This piece was exactly how I was feeling right before I read it. Thank you for putting into words something that I can't. That ache that you write about ...

As I stepped through the band hall doors, the contrasting temperature tickled the back of my neck and made the hair stand up on my arms. I subconsciously let my ...

Wow! I was very impressed with this piece even after the first paragraph. Your use of language was beautiful, and I loved it because I felt like it could describe ...

First of all, I think your perspective is something new and fresh which immediately spiked my interest. Thinking outside the box like that will push your writing to where you ...