Luvzi12

Okay that's fine! Just PM me or something when you do :D

Okay, just a few suggestions: I feel so lost at his gaze Tears started to run down my face. The words 'feel' and 'started' contradict each other because the word ...

He needed to hear the sound of his own voice for reassurance that he hadn't gone deaf. The deafening silence was too much for him to bear. I don't think ...

Yeah but even though the events are true (yeah, my Dad is this dumb and annoying!) they have been embellished quite a bit, and I think I could extend it ...

To remind yourself that, no matter what, you still haven't been divorced three times. What time is it?

She sells seashells on the seashore. Is my Dad about to yell at me?

I don’t notice the cold, the fact that my hands are so numb There should be a semi-colon (;) after the word cold. The water is quiet I'm confused, which ...

My Dad (a comic piece, read if you fancy a giggle and feel free to PM me on a Dad rant!) I’m pretty convinced that my Dad is beginning to ...

Okay, now I'm reviewing chapter 2! other scents she wasn’t sure of helping her racing heart to calm and slow. I don't think you need both words 'calm' and 'slow.' ...

Thanks, grammatical error modified hehe! The biography bit is a little flat, but it's because I started out writing it as a biography of her mother as a sort of ...

Good luck with wanting to be a proof reader! I want to be a literary critic, I always said from the age of three that I wanted to be a ...

it's weird when you dislike your own creation, isn't it? Haha! No, I don't think so! I think we're our own worst critics and it's normal to dislike our own ...

(sorry, I accidentally clicked 'ALT & S' so it sent before I'd finished!) So, to continue: I didn't understand this sentence, did you mean 'like a man who knows...', or ...

Just a few little nitpicks: I know she wishes to be at there, Perhaps it should be 'she wishes to be out there?' a threadbare armchair, with bare legs Just ...

I really enjoyed this and was hooked from the very beginning, it is very well-written and I really got a sense of the scene and could picture a scared and ...