Luvzi12

Which suggestions were you referring to, I mean, everyone has their own opinion, but I just thought you could be more specific. I agree on some accounts, but I was ...

Jamieson reminds me of 'Babeson', a fake name from the TV show 'Dirty Sexy money'. I prefer the name, but that's not really important, just thought I would mention it ...

Thanks very much to both of you for your input! I'm not sure about the teddybear line either, but also the real story behind it involves a teddybear, so I ...

I agree that you should keep the line about praying, but it's the 'without ceasing' part that bothers me. Maybe change it to: 'she would pray without rest', or: 'forever ...

Bruiser Crew They’ve got me surrounded. They’re bound to catch me now. There’s only one route of escape and only a fraction of a chance I can make it back ...

In answer to your poll (I answered 'they're OK'), I think that if only one character has an accent then it can be tolerated, or it has to be done ...

Thanks for your input Periwinkle! I agree with you on some of the points, specifcally a few word changes, such as 'elder' to 'older', but I think maybe you've missed ...

Haha! That is so funny and true! But the opposite happens too, I told my mum that i would be out all day going to see my friend Sam in ...

Whoops, on that last post I meant to say 'I think it should be in fiction '. Sorry about that x

I left my letter on the beach Hoping it was out of reach, I watched it from my window pane, With teddybear beside me. But watching something for so long, ...

I quite liked the idea of the poem, but I came across a few issues: Alert and alone An eerie wind blown... No eerie wind blown But a gentle breeze ...

Perhaps it is spelt different in the US, but in England 'fetus' (as you spelt it) is spelt 'foetus'. Sorry, just thought I would mention that, but, as I said, ...

It's a good start and actually seems to resonate with somethings that i think about when i wake up! I love to dream, but never thought of waking up as ...

each one covered in black woolen cloaks. Am curious, did you mean that they were both wearing multiple cloaks? Or is this a typo and they were both wearing a ...

I was quite surprised that you didn't use J. K. Rowling's style, but I've never actually read fan fiction before, so i guess you don't have to imitate the style ...