LittlePrincess

Actually it's the end of chapter three because I didn't post all of it and then what I have of chapter four. I have changed the time from saying "23 ...

I agree, I always right in past because I think it sounds better. To be completely honest I can never read through stories in present ^^ Thats a good point, ...

Hello! First off with the nitpicks... The trees and the bra n ches. The bugs and animals. All of the beautiful life here in Africa I'm no grammar expert but ...

Do you use past or present in your writing? Which one do you think is better? Does it depend on the story? I want you hear your thoughts!

Hello! The opening passage is a little unclear. I understand what you are trying to say but I would try and work on the sentence structures. "The faded green trees ...

Hello Servant! How are you today? It was actually pretty nice for it being the end of July Say what was pretty nice, the weather? temperature? and you can take ...

Thank you so much for the reviews! I have chapter three up if you want to read it,

Three days. Three days my only daughter had gone with out talking to me, it was tearing me apart. It was amazing how we could be living in the same ...

I need to write a college essay for tomorrow and I am completely stuck. Obviously no one here will be able to give me any specific ideas but any general ...

Chapter three, earlier than expected! First of all, did your MC come in the middle of the year? Why didn't she get introduced to the tournament like everyone else? A ...

Wow! There are a lot of parts up. I probably won't get to them all today but I'd like to read them at some point. Something I meant to say ...

I clicked on this story because I liked the title but once I found out it was a Harry Potter story I got extremely excited! The beginning could be a ...

We just learned about this in history class! (I assume you mean suffrage in the title) I think your opening line could be more grabbing, its not bad now but ...

Hello Ultraviolet! Your title intrigued me, that was probably the point. So I just sat at the edge of the river where water sloshed on my boots and sand stuck ...

I'm linking you to my novel, I only have two chapters up, although I may put a third up later. I would really appreciate a review for chapter 2 but ...