Lena.Wooldridge

There should be commas after both "yeah's". And the I've should normally be "I have", but since this piece is already so informal with all the "yeah's", I guess it's ...

I logged of my laptop and pulled out my IPod Touch. Opening the new email, I whispered, "This may be it." This is what it said: Dear Liz, 12/13/08 Love, ...

Concentrate & relax This should be italicized and the & should be replaced with an "and". Those words were whispering in my mind. If you are writing in 3rd person, ...

Hey Layla :) Thanks for posting something so short, it makes it much easier to read and review! I turn over as I hear a loud ring, coming from our ...

Hey Michael :) Just wanted to say that you are an excellent writer. Don't take anything I say personally, I just want to give the kind of critiques that I ...

That’s the new girl, they whisper, what a loser. Their murmurs blow around the room like bubbles, popping secrets and then vanishing. Try italicizing the whispering parts, so it's like: ...

I honestly had no idea what was going on during this story. I just have no clue. I thought that, maybe, at the end of the story you would have ...

Hey ya'll, just wrote this when I came home from school. Any critique is much appreciated. I'm guessing that you're going to say its disorganized and hard to follow.. but ...