Leahweird

Definitely a good start to something. I have teo critisisms though. First, this is just a nitpick but I think you spelled "bureau" wrong. (Unless you were trying to say ...

Ray I was in my bunk when the order to go to the mess hall came. It made me remember that I had forgotten to take on physical form again. ...

I think Ty and Serena already have theirs, but they'd probably be willing to help.

I wasn't going to put this in, but I really didn't like how the ending justtrailed of. I'll probably fix that during the editing process, but meanwhile here's a bonus ...

They sold Gus in the next village. They’d been haggling over a loaf of bread when it became clear that the baker’s young son had become enthralled with the little ...

Marguerite sat in the town square while the men assembled for the wolf hunt. She couldn’t wait inside. They might have left without her. She’d been there for hours and ...

Contemplating snagging the Seraph leader

Wow, big shift in mood there. I think you are having some trouble with "show vs. tell". To use the first paragraph as an example, you don't need to say ...

I see what you mean/ I would definitely be up for that.

Sebastian “I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” I said, with a lot more calm than I actually felt. This was a bad situation. Someone was definitely going to ...

Serena I had to smother a smile. Ty was a man after my own heart. I liked that. Nearly got himself killed, and then he was up and flirting. He ...

Jenko Everything seemed to happen at once. The supplies we needed materialized, despite the late Jenko was throwing together his bag, Firego came to see him. “It’s not your fault,” ...

Sebastian Brushing my hands along the stone walls I tried to make my way back to where my sister was. It wasn’t that difficult, but it didn’t help that she ...

Serena I tried to project to my brother that help had arrived. It wasn't a perfect process, but hopefully he was already feeling my relief and heading back our way. ...

Jenko He sat up in bed with a start. Even in his dreams he sensed that something was horribly wrong. Everything seemed normal at first, but a glance around the ...