LaurenOutLoud

Well, I saw a few grammatical errors, such as when you put 'there', you should have put 'their'. There were also a few sentences at the beginning that didn't really ...

Ok, thanks. Yeah, I was having some trouble with the tenses. :? Thanks again for the feed back. :smt001

Ok, yeah, thanks, I really needed some feed back on this! :smt001

That had a lot of emotion. I liked it. :smt001 It could have better fluency, but it's not bad. If you want some ideas for the title, how about Invisible ...

Well, there was one or 2 missing apostrophies and I saw some un-needed capitilization once or twice. And you put 'apart' where I think you meant to put 'a part'. ...

These were really nice! The last one flowed together nicely. The second one could have some more fluency to it. The first one was also a good poem, the last ...

I live in Virginia, where everything you do is close together, but there is still country. I'd love to move to just about any country in Europe, I'm taking German ...

Ok, thanks! :smt001

Oh whoops, I think I put this in the wrong topic. . . I think this is actually Science Fiction. . .

It was dusk; the sun was almost completely under the horizon. Out in the forest, near to the strange building that was about a mile away from Hapridge, a boy ...

This was great! It was very beautiful and had a ton of feeling. :elephant:

1) I like Fantasy, Adventure, Sci-fi, just about everything. . . I've never been a big fan of Historical Fiction though. 2) I love Garth Nix's work, I'm waiting in ...

Hi, like the title states, I'm new. My real name is Lauren. I love the colour purple. I know how to play the recorder, Viola, Flute, and my voice, I'd ...