Krupp

Well, it's 2009, and I still have yet to finish a follow-up story/novel/novella to It's in the Blood, which has never happened to me before. I usually get something finished ...

For some reason, this book of yours sounds strangely appealing...

...Use that as the thesis sentence and not the title of the whole paper, firstly. From there, just build up evidence to back up what you're saying. Make sure that ...

Sure have. Doesn't mean that one writes better when he's drunk though.

Why is it every time I see a song like this, Master of Puppets gets stuck in my head? Gaaahh... Simple and to the point. That's what these lyrics are.

I think the key then is that you blend 'said' with action tags in a manner where you aren't getting carried away with using either too much. Problem solved. haha.

Well, the mere mood of this one is fairly intense and creepy..I'll give you that. At times though it just seems like the lines are purposely vague or something. It's ...

Trust me, you'd be surprised how many kids are on these forums...but then again, it is called Young Writers Society so you should probably have expected nothing less... With that ...

I warn you now: this is a long chapter. I'm not one for writing short chapters except on a rare occasion. If you don't like reading long, descriptive chapters, or ...

Well...hm.... The story started off with a tad bit of info-dumping that I think could be altered a little bit so that it isn't 'telling' as much as showing. After ...

...Unless there's a part up ahead that explains it, I don't believe this is fantasy fiction...there are other subforums where this would've fit much better. With that said, I'll say ...

This helps considerably. Thanks mate.

I don't know what people's problems are with reading longer entries. I can do it easily. I do do it easily. I just don't get it. Hard to review? How ...

thanks for the read. I'll be putting up chapter 2 later on next week.

This story was inspired by a song called "Candlegoat" by the band Sunn O))). It's a creepy, drone metal/black metal song that has lyrics I won't even type here. Just ...