KookieKatie

Standing on the rooftop, wanting to fall Praying to God to end it all Taking a step would seal her fate Releasing her from a life of hate

I think this is a sweet, sad poem, but I have to say that you lack a LOT technical-wise. Rhythm, rhyme, stuff like that. Sorry, I'm in a rush - ...

Oh, here's my idea: A girl with military parents in the future. Not very distant, but they have new technologies and the governement is a little more controlling. The girl's ...

I didn't even know about NaNoWriMo until just now. (I joined in the middle of last November, so... ya know. Kinda late.) But this sounds like a TON of fun!! ...

I've read some of your other stuff before, and it's not as bad as this. I'm pretty sure you were dumbing yourself down while writing this poem to make your ...

I just finished reading a few... "It's Kind Of A Funny Story," which is the funniest book about depression ever written, a book of collective poems and short stories by ...

Hey. Very cute poem, very creative and imaginative. However, I have to say it's somewhat lacking in technicality. It wouldn't be too hard to fix - time-consuming, but easy. Just ...

Great technique, emotion, and conveying of the storyline. Overall, a great poem. I would like to hear more contrast of the happiness / sadness. Expand the first few lines into ...

Really great!! The revisions helped. One little tick that's really bugging me is that second line in the second stanza. It's a syllable longer then it should be. (Sorry, I'm ...

I think it's funny how everyone says that it reminds them of Taylor Swift even though then only thing in common is the title. It isn't even the same storyline!! ...

Very cute. It's so adorable. A few technical aspects that need analyzing... -In one of the lines you said cutious. I believe you meant curtious, which would make it just ...

This was a really inspring piece. It's very thoughtful. It's true, that kids growing up today are more encouraged to sit down in front of the TV then to play ...

This is really great work!! Most of the poetry in this section is rather depressing, it's refreshing to read soemthing that's all about love. :) One thing that REALLY bugged ...

Good work - very thoughtful and enjoyable. What drives me nuts, though, is that you didn't stick with the format in the third stanza that you established in the first ...

I really like this poem. Without further explanation, I will have to assume that Mute is a child who has recently been blinded. I can also assume that they are ...