Kiwisatsuma

Hey! :) I like this a lot. The metaphor worked really well and was really sweet, but also gave a balanced picture of the relationship. The only thing I would ...

Hey! :) First off, this seems more like a prologue than a preface. A preface is a preliminary statement that sets up the writers intention, that sort of thing, whereas ...

Hey! :) I like the story you tell here, and the emotion really builds as you get further on. However, I would say that the first three stanzas are weaker. ...

About the Kirja burning thing, I really don't know because I'm not sure what it is yet. XD It does seem to be important to Hail and the way he ...

Hey! :) Great chapter! It's definitely my favourite one so far. I like how you've shown more of the pups' characters. It looks like Isha's already covered a lot of ...

Hey :) This was really good, especially for something written in only half an hour. I especially liked the way the narrator was talking to their mum. However, while it's ...

Hey there :) I do think this has potential but, as the other reviewers have said, the way it's all shoved together in one thick paragraph makes it difficut to ...

It's very difficult to criticise Israel because the history of anti-semitism and the Holocaust is so awful, but I really don't agree with the actions of Isreal recently. Israel's strategy ...

Hey :) I thought this was good. I especially liked the contrast between the images in the first two stanzas and in the third, and the way it hinted at ...

Grave

Seventy thousand years in the future, the climate has changed drastically and humans have evolved to be nocturnal to escape the dangerous predators and poisonous creatures that come out during ...

The mother was overprotective because her first child had died at the age of two.

Clarissa The chauffeur opened the door and I stepped out and looked at the school which was to be my home. Quite frankly, it atrocious. It could have fitted three ...

Hey :) I like where this is going so far. Plunging straight in with an action scene drew me in well. However, I do agree with TheEnigma that the action ...

Hey there :) Welcome to YWS! :D So, this story seems interesting. You've got an exciting first chapter which drew me in quickly. However, there are a few small grammatical ...