Karsten

Hi Bickazer, All the usual things are right about this chapter. I loved the characterisation - you definitely don't need to worry about Tey's voice not being different enough. This ...

I agree with Karsten I never get tired of hearing those words. :wink:

Hi Bickazer, You asked about the description via PM, so description-specific comments. I did feel like there were some heavy chunks of description here. I started off liking it, but ...

edit: Uh, I'm not sure why I thought this post had no responses. Oops? Turns out everyone got there ahead of me.

Bujold is an incredible writer. I enjoyed Curse of Chalion, but my absolute favourite is her military SF series, the Vorkosigan Saga. The protagonist Miles Vorkosigan is so many kinds ...

TThanks for the critique. I have added in a lot more emotion, but I always just seem to have trouble with things like that. I think that I should also ...

Hi Merlin, I’ve read up to chapter nine, so the best part of 14k, and I feel like I have a grasp on the story’s good and bad points so ...

Hi there! I'd like to begin critiquing in this forum, but I can't always tell which pieces are in my preferred genres. Is there a chance you could ask people ...

Hi lizzytink, Unfortunately, I found this story quite difficult to follow. There are a lot of technical errors, like missing words, wrong dialogue punctuation, txtspk such as "thru" for "through", ...

(Disclaimer: no one method works for everyone, take what you need and leave the rest, may not know what I'm talking about, etc.) I've done a two-year stint in a ...

Hi GreatEscape, Just some quick thoughts. I have mixed feelings about the narrator here. She comes across to me as: * Conceited. She likes to think smugly about how beautiful ...

More people! Yay! :D 3 novels under your belt and working on your fourth? Remember it's about quality not quantity (: Hahahaha ... ahem. Sorry. I'm writing at the rate ...

Hi mimimac, Just a couple of points today. I got a rather disjointed, confused feeling from the narrative. I think it's because of the use of two specific techniques. #1 ...

Hi Light_Devil, This was bizarre, hilarious, confusing and gripping all at once. The premise sounds like it really ought to be a spoof, and I did crack up a few ...

Hi Dr.Atl, Just a quick crit before I pop out. I enjoyed the descriptive stuff here - the midwife being a "dollop of a woman" was particularly good and feels ...