Kale

Like great rivers of wood and wire They crisscross the land, Dividing it Into tidy partitions. Like streams and rivulets of twigs and twine They can be crossed, Split in ...

Hey there Brown Eyed Girl. Kat covered the punctuation pretty well, so I won't go over it. You probably should add some punctuation, though. Punctuation signals to the reader "this ...

The first poem was very cute made me laugh. I have no real crits for it. The second poem, on the other hand, has a very irregular rhythm. Also, the ...

... You need to watch your punctuation, rhyme scheme, syllable count, and line length. Poems, if you chose to follow punctuation conventions, are punctuated the same as regular sentences. Changing ...

Saluted your commander. Learnt never to surrender. Never doubting that hope would always/ever reign.... This evens up the length of this stanza with the next; pretty important considering that they ...

Comments and suggestions will be in orange, corrections in red. Sadness. This would work better as a completely separate stanza. It gives it more emphasis. The burning sensation trite; be ...

If you would, all of Thirilight that I have posted. :D The first chapter is here. The rest should be linked at the top of the page or I have ...

Fixed the typos. *feels silly for missing them after having proofread thrice* I see no reason for the struck out line. Without it, it is implied in bedroom - as ...

My comments and suggestions shall be in orange. Corrections will be in red. So many unfinished lines, Black scrawls that sit Above blank pages, Contrasting so sharply Against that seemingly ...

First off, I see spelling mistakes. You seem to be able to find them yourself, so I won't point them out. If only all Life dies, then those with no ...

The socks play a pretty important role fairly soon. :3 Thanks for the suggestions and the critique. *sends love* I'll PM you if I remember to. x_X

Little Monkey It wasn't dark. It wasn't cold. It wasn't foreign, and she wasn't lost. It was a warm summer's day. She was sitting in her bedroom, the only one ...

For someone who doesn't care about grammar, you did a pretty good job with following the rules. :P This story has a lot of potential. The basic plot isn't all ...

Thanks for the reviews. I've fixed the underline/italics bit. When I previewed the post, the italics didn't seem very noticeable, so I changed it to underline. Big mistake, apparently. XD ...

Aside from what the other two have mentioned, there are a couple things I'd like to add. First off, when you do describe things (like the prince's shield), it is ...